A fear of failure is completely normal. Fear in small doses can even help to improve your performance in general. Our fears express what is important to us: success and recognition in our profession and in society by other people. The more important something is to us, the more we are afraid of losing it.
An excessive fear of failure, however, blocks our abilities. Like most fears, excessive fears, which ultimately lead to mental blockages, find their origin in our childhood caused by our upbringing.
How does a fear of failure arise?
A fear of failure is learned. Due to specific experience in childhood, we develop a low feeling of self-worth and from this a strong if not overreaching need for recognition develops. This need for recognition by others leads to a fear of rejection and thus to a fear of failure.
Instead of allowing children freedom from restraints as far as possible, excessive rules of behaviour are often imposed that prevent any unrestricted behaviour. “I will only be accepted if I’m nice.“ The dependent child instead learns as a means of self-protection how he has to behave in order to please his parents or those raising him.
If we don’t have the basic trust that we will be taken care of, then we develop a major fear of rejection and of being cast aside, which today is responsible for your fear of rejection and of failure.
A fear of failure can exhibit itself in many different ways at a professional and social level, which can react together with different areas of social anxiety: “A man sees a lady at a party whom he finds attractive and he thinks about whether he should speak to her.“ “An employee is offered a management position but is afraid of failing when giving speeches at meetings behind closed doors.”
Ultimately a fear of failure is the result of social anxiety, which has arisen during our upbringing through suppressing emotions and by a restricted and preventive pattern of behaviour.
How can I now get over fear of failure systematically?
So that the self-conscious, restricted person can once again develop freely and self-assuredly, his social anxiety and fears must be systematically replaced by unrestricted, behavioural responses.
An effective opportunity to obtain an unrestricted and normal reaction system is by self-application of the EL-METHOD by Tony Gaschler.
Read now how the EL-METHOD by Tony Gaschler works
EL-METHOD | How to get over fear of failure