Charles Darwin himself described shyness as one of the main causes of blushing.
The four main characteristics of a shy person are:
- Owing to a lack of self-confidence, the shy person places an exceedingly high level of importance on the opinion of other people.
- The shy person is constantly afraid to express their true thoughts, feelings, emotions and moods, and therefore gives the impression of a reserved, modest person who has inhibitions about expressing themselves.
- They normally look timid and uncertain.
- A person suffering from shyness easily blushes and usually without any apparent reason for doing so.
The main cause of these social inhibitions and emotional blockages, that is, that so many people have a lack of self-confidence and suffer from low feelings of self-worth, lies without doubt in an authoritarian and repressive upbringing.
At the same time, however, we should not place the blame directly on individual parents or teachers as they, too, have suffered an authoritarian and repressive upbringing at the hands of their parents and grandparents. We have to look at where the blame really lies, namely with the entire system of raising children in the past, which unfortunately is still in effect very widespread today.
As an authoritarian and repressive upbringing always assumes that children should think, feel and do whatever adults think, feel and do, this leads to placing too high a value on the opinion of other people while at the same time undervaluing one’s own opinion. And this is one of the main characteristics of the inhibited, insecure and shy person.
As a child may not express his or her thoughts, sentiments, feelings, emotions and opinions freely, truly and spontaneously in an authoritarian and repressive upbringing without being punished or at the very least without expecting to be criticised for them, habitual blockages occur in personal expression.
Shy people are always inhibited in expressing themselves because in childhood and during their youth they learned to repress, withhold and hide their natural feelings and emotions.
However, where a child has been beaten or abused for years, and despite this for once wants or wanted to express him or herself freely, genuinely and spontaneously, usually an almost panic-ridden fear of free expression exists. With time young people become used to having to withhold and repress their feelings and emotions and thus they become modest, reserved, submissive and ”well brought up“ adults, who have the disadvantage that they suffer from inhibitions such as shyness and inferiority complexes.
Although people who suffer from shyness usually give the impression of being calm, modest, submissive and “well-behaved“, usually inside they are often seething with hate, antisocial thoughts and subconscious feelings of revenge towards their family members, the people around them and often against all human society.
As shy people have not learned to express their emotions (sentiments, feelings and disposition) freely, authentically and spontaneously, they are full of blocked emotions and it is precisely this that keeps their inhibited self and shyness effective their entire lives.
The inner intellectual world of the shy person is a logical consequence of their false upbringing and as this maelstrom of ideas is not always “moral“, such people usually have some kind of guilty conscience.
This apparently guilty conscience then involuntarily releases a kind of uncertainty in the eye movements and expression in the presence of other people. At the same time the thought arises: “What would others think if they know what I was thinking?”
In this way the shy person is practically forced to continue to repress, withhold and hide their true thoughts, sentiments, feelings, emotions and opinions. This then continues to keep the cycle going of being inhibited, of shyness and of the annoying habit of blushing.
How to free yourself effectively from shyness and your face turning red can be learned immediately with the EL-METHOD from Tony Gaschler.
Effectively overcome your face turning red with the aid of the EL-METHOD
German language version: Ist Schüchternheit die einzige Ursache von Erröten | Rotwerden?